What not to do in Amsterdam: A completely biased guide from someone who did all of it

Start by not renting a bike immediately

I get it. You're in Amsterdam, the bike capital of the universe. You’re excited. You rent a bike within 5 minutes of arriving. Great idea, until you realize you haven’t biked since high school and you’re currently standing in the middle of a high-speed bike lane holding a paper map.

The locals move like they're in the Tour de France. You? You move like a confused turtle. Respect the flow. Walk first. Learn the rules. Then rent the bike. Or wear armor.

Don’t call everything a “coffeeshop”

This one’s important. A coffeeshop in Amsterdam does not mean a cozy place where you sip a cappuccino and journal about your feelings. No. It means a place where you legally buy weed and may or may not end up having a very philosophical conversation with a stranger about cats.

If you want actual coffee, go to a café. If you want to forget how elevators work for three hours, go to a coffeeshop. Know the difference.

Don’t ignore the street food

There is more to life than sit-down meals. Amsterdam has snack culture down to a science. Do not skip:

• Fries with curry mayo – Look weird. Taste like victory.
• Bitterballen – Tiny fried spheres of molten meat lava. Wait until they cool. This is not a drill.
• Herring – It’s raw fish. It’s a rite of passage. You’ll live. Probably.

Don’t stay in the city center the whole time

Yes, the canals are cute. Yes, Dam Square exists. But if you spend all your time where every other tourist is, you’ll start to feel like a herd animal. Step outside the loop.

Try these areas instead:

• De Pijp – For food, markets, and a level of cool that makes you want to wear sunglasses indoors.
• Jordaan – For quiet streets, quirky shops, and that one bakery that smells like heaven.
• Amsterdam Noord – For ferry rides and feeling edgy because it’s “across the water.”

Don’t underestimate the weather

You will pack for mild spring. You will get soaked in 5 minutes. You will curse the sky. And then it will be sunny again like nothing happened. Amsterdam’s weather is chaotic good.

Bring layers. Bring a small umbrella. And emotionally prepare to look like a damp tourist in every photo.

Don’t skip museums just because you’re not a “museum person”

Even if you haven’t thought about art since you finger-painted a tree in second grade, Amsterdam’s museums will pull you in.

• Rijksmuseum – Where the paintings are older than your family tree.
• Van Gogh Museum – Come for the sunflowers, stay for the emotional spiral.
• MOCO Museum – Banksy, Warhol, neon signs, and general Instagram bait.

Don’t rely only on Google Maps

Amsterdam is full of winding streets and lookalike canals. You’ll be walking for five minutes and suddenly end up back where you started like you're in a European version of Pac-Man.

My advice? Get lost on purpose. You’ll stumble into shops that sell nothing but socks, tiny art galleries, or bakeries that smell so good you’ll abandon your entire itinerary.

Don’t overplan every hour

Amsterdam rewards wanderers. The best things I found weren’t on a list—they just happened.

A jazz band playing in a tiny courtyard. A guy selling fresh stroopwafels from a cart. A floating flower market. A cat café where the cats judged me but the coffee was decent.

Don’t leave without doing something totally random

Ride a swing on top of a building. Eat Indonesian food in a Dutch houseboat. Take a canal tour with wine and strangers. Visit a museum dedicated to cats. Yes, that’s real.

Amsterdam is weird in the best way. Lean into it.

In conclusion: do what I didn’t, and also do what I did

Mistakes were made. Fries were dropped. Bikes were nearly crashed. But it was amazing.

Don’t follow a perfect itinerary. Follow your stomach, your curiosity, and occasionally a Dutch person who looks like they know where the good snacks are.

That’s how you Amsterdam right.